“How do you love fully, without reservation, knowing that every one you love will die, change or move away?” I began asking myself this question at age 11 and over the years it became a kind of personal koan that I wrestled with and returned to over and over. This time was it was different; rather than pushing down the pain, I opened to it. On April 22nd I wrote, ” I am living my way into a new answer, finally dismantling the armor around my heart.